finding reliable medical practitioners

[doltom]

crayon3w,
RI is almost impossible. Do not go to Hasbro Children's by all means, and if you can stay out of Boston's Children do.  They were one of the first to adopt the dutch protocol.  I think your son is better off staying out of therapy than getting into it with someone bad.  I know there is a somatic therapy institute there which may be able to help him reconnect with his body.  Look them up and call and ask, ask, ask about their stance on GD.  There is also the Internal Family Systems meths to try as per Sasha Ayad, there are a few in Mass and RI: https://ifs-institute.com

I a completely new at this.  I'm very interested in the IFS you mention.  I also really like everything Sasha Ayad has to say - so logical and reasonable!  I haven't come across her talking about IFS.  She produces content prolifically, and I don't even know where to look...  A google search is not producing much.  Can you point me to a specific podcast/blog/youtube video in which she addresses this please?  Thank you so much.

[Lion]

You are right, Sasha is prolific and I don't remember if she spoke about it specifically- she has this video listed on her Welcome Page for resources, as well as the link I posted before:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ym8o762U7uc

[MKEM0M]

Hi! I am in the Chicago area looking for a therapist for my 16 year old daughter who is struggling with ROGD. We had an appointment at the Lurie gender questioning clinic which I canceled after finding these resources! Thanks! Does anyone have any recommendations as to a therapist; she prefers a female because she’s “intimidated” by men (her words.)
Thanks!

Hi Im in the Milwaukee area. With a nearly 13 year old daughter. I wish I had a recommendation for you. If you find someone, please share. Id be happy to make the trip to Chicagoland for good help for my daughter. We have been fortunate though. Her pediatrician has been supportive, not affirming, and will not refer to endocrinologist. She does not agree this is transgenderism. She also knows a referral to endocrinology and gender clinic is a sure diagnosis an immediate start of puberty blockers. I am happy to have an ally in our pediatrician. Our daughters therapist has been less uh. On the same page. More affirming. Less challenging of the identity. Shes not pushing us to get her on puberty blockers or anything. But is using male pronouns and her male name. 
also terribly frustrated by our school district trying to force us to register her as male. NoT GoInG To HaPpEn! Currently trying to get my daughter to compromise with neutral pronouns at school ey/em. Since she is now identifying as a gay boy “twink” as she realizes she likes to dress like a girl and wear make and is more sexually attracted to boys.     So at least she has stopped trying to look male. Like shes trying to wear a shoe that doesnt fit. But she is breast binding. Well. Now im off on a tangent. 
any way. Good look on the therapist hunt!  It is hard to find. And if you do find someone, it seems their caseload is full and arent taking new clients.

[MamaBear22]

Looking for therapist in Michigan or California- Thank you all

[Dadperson]

Hi Dad in Chicago of a highly intelligent sensitive 13 year old biological girl that identifies as nonbinary since some time during this pandemic but has recently changed their pronouns from they/them to he/them. After watching dozens of transition videos on YouTube Ive gotten the sense where this is possibly heading. There are 5 kids in total in her class of 24 that identify as trans which statistically seems so unlikely. My kid recently expressed the desire to force all parents to raise their children as theybies as one of her goals if you need any indication of how far down the gender ideology rabbit hole she has gone. We found a therapist that seems somewhat non affirming but my daughter senses corrected that they have little experience in the gender area and is requesting a change which scares me because Chicago is a gender transition hub and probably more affirmative than many places. Any help appreciated

[Marge Bouvier Simpson]

Hi Dad in Chicago of a highly intelligent sensitive 13 year old biological girl that identifies as nonbinary since some time during this pandemic but has recently changed their pronouns from they/them to he/them. After watching dozens of transition videos on YouTube Ive gotten the sense where this is possibly heading. There are 5 kids in total in her class of 24 that identify as trans which statistically seems so unlikely. My kid recently expressed the desire to force all parents to raise their children as theybies as one of her goals if you need any indication of how far down the gender ideology rabbit hole she has gone. We found a therapist that seems somewhat non affirming but my daughter senses corrected that they have little experience in the gender area and is requesting a change which scares me because Chicago is a gender transition hub and probably more affirmative than many places. Any help appreciated

Hi Dadperson,

Welcome to the forum. Your account has been activated, so I recommend you post your query in the members-only area, as this public portion of the forum doesn't get too much traffic from our members. 

I'm sorry for your and your daughter's troubles. Your story will sound familiar to many of our members. I think you'll find the unanimous advice not to take her to a gender clinic or gender specialist. What is that saying "when one is a hammer, everything looks like a nail." Or something like that. Gender clinics and gender specialists will surely take your daughter's self diagnosis at face value, affirm her, and put her on the path to transition. 

There is advice in the members-only area for parents in your basic position. I hope you'll find it helpful.

[Dadperson]

\

Thank you so much Marge!

[Momof2boys]

I have a fourteen-year old who started to have sudden onset gender dysphoria at age thirteen along with identifying from that time as a trans guy. My teen has a set of other issues as well, particularly anxiety attacks and depression. I would like to find a psychiatrist in the Denver metro area who could work with these other issues and consider whether to recommend antidepressants. A psychologist or analyst who would be committed to discussing possible non-medical ways of dealing with the dysphoria, depression, and anxiety would also be helpful. I am very concerned about what I have heard about hormones and surgeries being recommended to teens, and would like to avoid health care practitioners who would steer my teen in that direction. Does anybody know of reliable psychiatrists or other health care practitioners in the Denver metro area? On a broader note, what experiences have you all had with helping a trans identified teen with anxiety, depression, and gender dysphoria, and have you found medical practitioners who were committed to examining other avenues than referrals to clinics for hormones and surgeries?  

Tamara,
I am also looking for providers in the Denver area. My 16 year old daughter, who suffers from anxiety and depression, also just told us she is trans.  I am happy to share my research with you. Have you had any luck finding help?
MothersLove

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I am also looking for providers in the Denver area.  I am happy to share my research with others in Denver looking for therapists as well.

My 16 year old daughter just told us she is trans, she also suffers from depression, anxiety and is completely addicted to the internet.  I feel like she is a very classic case of ROGD and I am very nervous about finding the right support for her. 

I am also interested in learning more about attachment parenting.  I feel like she turned to the internet in 2015 when my husband and I were going through a very rough time in our marriage, I feel like she drifted away when we were guilty of being emotionally unavailable during a very pivotal time in her life. We need guidance in trying to reconnect with her.

[herrera1970]

Hello,

I am looking for a therapist in Orange County, CA for my 13-year-old daughter who announced she was transgender in June 2021. My daughter was seen by Ajanta Naidu, MD at The UCI Gender Diversity Program. Dr. Naidu was quick to assess my child & recommended for me to start her in the transition process. Blood work has been done on my daughter & now I'm being pushed to choose from the UCI list of affirming therapists. These therapists will eventually sign off on my 13-year-old daughter's redness. I'm very open and affirming. However, this process is moving too fast for me, considering my child's age. My daughter is not suicidal at all & has been greatly influenced by how cool it is to be transgender, via social media. She doesn't like her menstrual cycle, has some depression and anxieties. I would rather address these conditions, before puberty blockers and testosterone.

I would greatly welcome any suggestions,

Thanks,
Rick

[Marge Bouvier Simpson]

Hello,

I am looking for a therapist in Orange County, CA for my 13-year-old daughter who announced she was transgender in June 2021.  My daughter was seen by Ajanta Naidu, MD at The UCI Gender Diversity Program. Dr. Naidu was quick to assess my child & recommended for me to start her in the transition process. Blood work has been done on my daughter & now I'm being pushed to choose from the UCI list of affirming therapists. These therapists will eventually sign off on my 13-year-old daughter's redness. I'm very open and affirming. However, this process is moving too fast for me, considering my child's age. My daughter is not suicidal at all & has been greatly influenced by how cool it is to be transgender, via social media. She doesn't like her menstrual cycle, has some depression and anxieties. I would rather address these conditions, before puberty blockers and testosterone.

I would greatly welcome any suggestions,

Thanks,
Rick

Hi, Rick and welcome to the forum. I'm sorry about what you're going through with your daughter. It's just nuts (criminal, really) that a medical professional would quickly affirm a confused young teen girl as a boy and recommend testosterone for her at 13. I'm so sorry. 

I hope you can find someone to address her issues. It is very difficult to do so as doctors and therapists will be accused of conversion therapy if they don't just take what the kid says at face value and affirm them as trans, and as you may know conversion therapy is illegal in your state. Although of course what we are discussing is not conversion therapy, trans extemists have managed to get it defined as such in the law, when the law was origianlly written to target anti-gay programs that used cruel, abusive aversion tactics to convince kids they were not gay. What we are talking about is talk therapy for confused, hurting kids who have been caught up in a social contagion for any number of reasons, from autism to OCD to sexual abuse to psychological trauma such as bullying. It is astonishing that these professionals can't see what's going on with the social contagion. 

Your membership has been activated, so I suggest you post your query in the members-only area, as forum members don't frequent this public section too often. 

I also recommend you join Parents of ROGD Kids (PROGDK). People are often hesitant to reach out to unknowns on an anonymous forum. PROGDK has a vetting process and once you're vetted, they will put you in touch via email with other parents in your area (or you can meet in person or talk over the phone if you and other parents choose to do so). Parents may then feel more confident about sharing information such as a therapist's or doctor's name with vetted group members in their area as opposed to an anonymous forum.

To join, go to parentsofrogdkids.com, click in the red bar across the top, and follow the prompts. Vetting can take a week or two, I believe, so please be patient with the volunteers who are doing their best.

Also, keep in mind that therapists are difficult to find. PROGDK membership has been a great experience for me and I encourage everyone to join, but don't count on being handed a list of therapists in your area. There may be a few possibilities or there may be zero. Your best bet may end up calling around (or emailing) to interview therapists yourself.

It's also possible that you might get more mileage from listening to the "Gender: A Wider Lens" podcasts from Sasha Ayad and Stella O'Malley. Some kids will close themselves off to any therapist who doesn't immediately affirm, some kids simply don't want help or think they don't need help, and some therapists who are willing to avoid immediate affirmation don't really know how to effectively approach these kids to reach them, or end up affirming after a month or two. Stella and Sasha seem to have a handle on effectively working with kids like ours, perhaps better than anyone.

Please know I'm not saying that therapy is hopeless or that good therapists are impossible to find. I'm just offering alternatives because the cards seem to be stacked against us when it comes to therapy, for several reasons. Stay hopeful, keep searching for therapists who are helpful, but know that your best bet may be subtly and judiciously questioning your kid, teaching them critical thinking, getting them out of the house to do something constructive or creative, helping them grow into independent young adults, etc., combined with learning what you can from Stella and Sasha and any other well knowns you like who are offering advice and insight to the public.