25-Jan-2021, 06:38 PM
Hello. My 15 year old teenage son came out as gay before Christmas. We were completely accepting of this and he hasn’t said anything about it since, but today (prompted by an email from school saying that he hasn’t been handing in his homework whilst on lockdown) he broke down and said that he thinks he might be non binary or even trans. He said he is horribly confused- he doesn’t “think” he wants a surgical transition, or that he wants to live as a woman, but says he might at some point. I (gently) asked if he had tried cross-dressing and he said that he has not. I asked him how long he had felt this way and said for a couple of years- since puberty presumably.
He used the term skoliosexual, which in his understanding seems to mean has a sexual attraction to trans people. I again (gently) asked if he had been looking at trans porn and he said he had. I then asked him what real life attractions he has had- he told me he had one crush on a boy (a heterosexual boy, so never disclosed his feelings) and years ago did like girls “a bit” but not now.
My conclusions so far as I can process my thoughts right now are:
- Gay or bisexual seem to me to be much more helpful ways for him to think about his sexuality.
- He has no real life sexual experience with an actual person.
- He has been looking at porn and has confused a fantasy with a lifestyle
- He’s 15 and his hormones will be all over the place.
He knows he is loved and supported, but I’m terrified of him being drawn in by trans activists who will convince him that the only possible step is for him to transition.
In fact, he even said to me that he knows there is a diffference between biological sex and gender and that he doesn’t want to change his sex.
He used the term skoliosexual, which in his understanding seems to mean has a sexual attraction to trans people. I again (gently) asked if he had been looking at trans porn and he said he had. I then asked him what real life attractions he has had- he told me he had one crush on a boy (a heterosexual boy, so never disclosed his feelings) and years ago did like girls “a bit” but not now.
My conclusions so far as I can process my thoughts right now are:
- Gay or bisexual seem to me to be much more helpful ways for him to think about his sexuality.
- He has no real life sexual experience with an actual person.
- He has been looking at porn and has confused a fantasy with a lifestyle
- He’s 15 and his hormones will be all over the place.
He knows he is loved and supported, but I’m terrified of him being drawn in by trans activists who will convince him that the only possible step is for him to transition.
In fact, he even said to me that he knows there is a diffference between biological sex and gender and that he doesn’t want to change his sex.
