About the Gender Critical Support Board

[143mykid]

I am looking for a therapist for my teen girl who has socially transitioned FTM.  I know there are underlying issues with her body that she is trying to escape and she is currently in a protective bubble in a school with a community of other ftm. I am in the New England area. Anyone have any luck in finding a traditional therapist in this area? Any help in this endeavor will be greatly appreciated. Thanks!

[BlueMom]

I'm shaking as as write this. How did I end up here? And at the same time I'm so comforted that I'm not alone - so many parents going through the same thing... and I'm relieved to have found this forum... 

My beautiful 16-year old daughter has suddenly decided she is transgender - and like so many others - it is completely out of the blue. There have been no signs, no indications that she has ever wanting to be a boy. She has never been a tomboy, never dressed like a boy, never played like a boy, never expressed anything at anytime that would indicate that she is a boy. And like so many others - she "just knows" and "my friends agree too" and "you don't know me". 8 months ago she went from having a serious crush on a male schoolmate to having a girlfriend. And again - nothing has indicated she was bisexual. We have always been close, spending a lot of time together, talking until now. She has closed us out, "we don't understand" and of course all her information comes from numerous YouTube videos and now TikTok. I'm absolutely terrified she will act on her self-diagnosis and be able to find a random free clinic and get access to hormones. And I know she (and me and my husband) needs professional help and guidance  - and I'm frantically screening therapists to find someone who is not all about affirmation of a 16-year old's current mood which seems to be the mainstream response to this today. How do you find an old-school therapist who can guide her through this... 

We have realized we have just started a long marathon with an unknown ending. Just when we thought we were at the end of active parenting with only one year left of high school. I guess it's time to start running. Deep breath.... 

[Jdmum]

I'm shaking as as write this. How did I end up here? And at the same time I'm so comforted that I'm not alone - so many parents going through the same thing... and I'm relieved to have found this forum... 

My beautiful 16-year old daughter has suddenly decided she is transgender - and like so many others - it is completely out of the blue. There have been no signs, no indications that she has ever wanting to be a boy. She has never been a tomboy, never dressed like a boy, never played like a boy, never expressed anything at anytime that would indicate that she is a boy. And like so many others - she "just knows" and "my friends agree too" and "you don't know me". 8 months ago she went from having a serious crush on a male schoolmate to having a girlfriend. And again - nothing has indicated she was bisexual. We have always been close, spending a lot of time together, talking until now. She has closed us out, "we don't understand" and of course all her information comes from numerous YouTube videos and now TikTok. I'm absolutely terrified she will act on her self-diagnosis and be able to find a random free clinic and get access to hormones. And I know she (and me and my husband) needs professional help and guidance  - and I'm frantically screening therapists to find someone who is not all about affirmation of a 16-year old's current mood which seems to be the mainstream response to this today. How do you find an old-school therapist who can guide her through this... 

We have realized we have just started a long marathon with an unknown ending. Just when we thought we were at the end of active parenting with only one year left of high school. I guess it's time to start running. Deep breath.... 

BlueMom

You are certainly not alone in all of this.  Once you have your account activated you’ll be able to access the forums & get lots of help & advice x

[Tinaar]

The story of my daughter seemingly over a months time of meeting a trans boy, she tells me she is trans. I truly believe since there was no showing of this ever before that this is unresolved grief. Her dad, my husband died almost 2 yrs ago. She is depressed, anxious and hates the changes her body is going through. I hate to see her so sad. I have tried several therapists for her and am currently waiting for a certain therapist to call me back. I need help as the sole working parent. I can’t keep it all afloat. I am anxiously awaiting approval to get access to the private forums. Anyone in Southern CA here?

[Marge Bouvier Simpson]

Hi Tinaar,

I'm so sorry to hear about your husband as well as what your daughter is going through. So many of our kids have some sort of grief or trauma they are dealing with. I believe you are spot on with your observation that her desire to be trans likely stems from her grief. Add in the changes of puberty and a "brave" friend who is making trans look like an attractive answer to life's problems, and that could be more than enough to send a kid wishing for her own new identity, her own transformation into someone strong and brave and different.

Your account has been activated. Welcome.

Welcome.

[Guest]

I am looking for a therapist for my teen girl who has socially transitioned FTM.  I know there are underlying issues with her body that she is trying to escape and she is currently in a protective bubble in a school with a community of other ftm. I am in the New England area. Anyone have any luck in finding a traditional therapist in this area? Any help in this endeavor will be greatly appreciated. Thanks!

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[KJmama]

I'm so alone. Friends buy into the new gender ideology, and family is at the other extreme (bad attitudes on homosexuality, gender nonconforming, etc). Even my ex went from acting as a team w/me, to saying our daughter will only pull away more if we "push it." He's "affirming" her, and I'm scared it's a matter of time before she goes to live with him. He has no rules, doesn't moniter electronics, and now says he's "open" to transition....it would be such a nightmare.

I'm even more upset because my daughter just turned 17, so there's not much time before she has medical autonomy. I still hope she'll lose interest or come to her senses before then....I mean, this whole nightmare only started in Aug 2019. But I fear a horrible collision between the timeing of this ROGD phase, and the timeline of my daughter being "old enough" to get hormones/surgery. (Old enough in quotes, because I can't believe 18 yr olds get to make such life altering decisions.)

This whole situation is tearing me up inside.

[Marge Bouvier Simpson]

I'm so alone. Friends buy into the new gender ideology, and family is at the other extreme (bad attitudes on homosexuality, gender nonconforming, etc). Even my ex went from acting as a team w/me, to saying our daughter will only pull away more if we "push it." He's "affirming" her, and I'm scared it's a matter of time before she goes to live with him. He has no rules, doesn't moniter electronics, and now says he's "open" to transition....it would be such a nightmare.

I'm even more upset because my daughter just turned 17, so there's not much time before she has medical autonomy. I still hope she'll lose interest or come to her senses before then....I mean, this whole nightmare only started in Aug 2019. But I fear a horrible collision between the timeing of this ROGD phase, and the timeline of my daughter being "old enough" to get hormones/surgery. (Old enough in quotes, because I can't believe 18 yr olds get to make such life altering decisions.)

This whole situation is tearing me up inside.

Hi KJmama, 

I'm so sorry to hear about your daughter and the tough situation you are in with your ex.

Your account has been activated. I hope you will find the members-only area helpful.

Welcome. You are not alone.