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Thread Review (Newest First)
Posted by Marge Bouvier Simpson - 4 hours ago
(6 hours ago)MomToTroubledTeen Wrote: Hello Rachel's Mom, I can't help with your primary ask: for a gender critical therapist in Denver, CO, but I can tell you that if my child were still a minor I would take very direct action to change her world. That means: choke the internet. Block sites like Youtube, tumblr, tic toc, discord, and all the others. Get her off of social media. Shut off all devices except for during very limited hours for school or other necessary work. Do not compromise on this. If you have a religious practice, look to spiritual advisors and mentors for your daughter. Look to outdoors programs that engage her in strenuous physical activity. If merited, do diagnostic testing to see if there are other physical or mental problems: personality disorder, neurological disorder, chronic stress (there's a blood test for this), history of trauma that merits trauma treatment, or other conditions. What I'm saying is: there is a LOT you can do without a therapist. If you get a therapist who believes strongly in "affirmative care" then your daughter will be encouraged in her delusional preoccupations. So, no therapist is better than a bad therapist.

Great post, MomToTroubledTeen. Well put.
Posted by MomToTroubledTeen - 6 hours ago
Hello Rachel's Mom, I can't help with your primary ask: for a gender critical therapist in Denver, CO, but I can tell you that if my child were still a minor I would take very direct action to change her world. That means: choke the internet. Block sites like Youtube, tumblr, tic toc, discord, and all the others. Get her off of social media. Shut off all devices except for during very limited hours for school or other necessary work. Do not compromise on this. If you have a religious practice, look to spiritual advisors and mentors for your daughter. Look to outdoors programs that engage her in strenuous physical activity. If merited, do diagnostic testing to see if there are other physical or mental problems: personality disorder, neurological disorder, chronic stress (there's a blood test for this), history of trauma that merits trauma treatment, or other conditions. What I'm saying is: there is a LOT you can do without a therapist. If you get a therapist who believes strongly in "affirmative care" then your daughter will be encouraged in her delusional preoccupations. So, no therapist is better than a bad therapist.
Posted by Rachael's Mom - 6 hours ago
Hi. I am a new member. I live in Denver, CO. I am a mother of almost 16 yo girl who told me (2 months ago) that she hates her body and gets depressed looking at her body. She wants to have a male body and wants my understanding and support. I was shocked because she was a girl who wanted to have bigger breasts and more curvy body and talking about cute boys last year. Now she has been hiding her breasts under thick chest band and baggy boy clothing (for past couple of months). She says she knows what she wants and who she is. I feel like I lost my daughter. So sad. It hurts to watch her suffer emotionally. She says she feels miserable in her body. I cry alone time to time and feel so lost.
Couple of months ago, she started to dress "dark" and says she thinks she is lesbian. She never dated anyone yet (although I was open about her dating). Now she thinks she is in wrong body.
I has a good relationship with her. She tells me how she feels most of the time. She is a lovely, social, sweat and straight A student who did not get in to any trouble before. I am divorced but I have provided stable home environment. She wants to have a counseling to help her through this transformation. I want to make sure that the way she feels now is not a secondary or reaction to other psychological issues. I am looking for a counselor who can help her look into herself but not someone who can help her affirm or transform yet. I did my own search and unable to find anyone yet. Do you know anyone or direct me to someone who can help?
I had a conflict with her yesterday. She wants to buy boy underwear and I did not support her. She thinks I am not supporting her and I care more about my feelings than hers. I and she really need help before it ruins out relationship. I am not good at talking when there is a conflict.
Posted by Mom2mnmz - 22-Jun-2021, 09:11 PM
(01-Jun-2021, 06:19 AM)Luna\s Mom Wrote: Hello, I'm in the PA area and looking for a therapist.  My daughter is now 17 and when she was in the 9th grade decided she is transgender, in middle school she was pansexual.  I love her and support her but I do not see her as a boy since this change in her was so sudden.  She was always a little girly girl prancing around in toy high heels and play make-up.  I need recommendations for a therapist who will get to the core of her issues and open her eyes to the reality of her virtual world.  I believe she's been influenced by her friends and social media.  Please help with any info and recommendations!  I can't seem to find any therapist that will address our concerns.

Where in Pennsylvania?
I can recommend someone. Please PM me. He is actually my counselor as I wanted to find someone to hold my hand through this journey.  I think very highly of him.  He is gender-critical.

Now I just need to find a new counselor for my daughter as the one she picked for herself is just making everything worse.
Posted by Luna's Mom - 01-Jun-2021, 06:19 AM
Hello, I'm in the PA area and looking for a therapist.  My daughter is now 17 and when she was in the 9th grade decided she is transgender, in middle school she was pansexual.  I love her and support her but I do not see her as a boy since this change in her was so sudden.  She was always a little girly girl prancing around in toy high heels and play make-up.  I need recommendations for a therapist who will get to the core of her issues and open her eyes to the reality of her virtual world.  I believe she's been influenced by her friends and social media.  Please help with any info and recommendations!  I can't seem to find any therapist that will address our concerns.
Posted by Marge Bouvier Simpson - 17-May-2021, 12:58 PM
(16-May-2021, 06:56 PM)MomToTroubledTeen Wrote:
(29-Mar-2018, 08:10 PM)tamara Wrote: Hello I'm new to this GCSB and I cannot figure out how to get to the "members" section. I go around & around & can't get out of the guest zone. I am logged in. Could you PLEASE explain how to "post" in the "members only forum"? I can't figure out this website. I guess I should be more savvy. 
Thanks!

MODERATOR EDIT: If you are seeking therapist recommendations, please join this forum as a member; once your membership is activated, please post your request in our members-only forum. Once you have joined the forum, you will be able to send and receive private messages (PMs) from fellow members -- and this is the preferred method of exchanging therapist information. Due to privacy considerations, we are no longer posting therapist names on the forum.

To join the board, click on "join" in the black bar at the top of the page and follow the prompts. Please know that before new members can access the members-only forums, all memberships must be manually activated by a moderator, and this can take anywhere from an hour to a day. Your patience is necessary and appreciated. Thank you.

Now back to Tamara's post:

I have a fourteen-year old who started to have sudden onset gender dysphoria at age thirteen along with identifying from that time as a trans guy. My teen has a set of other issues as well, particularly anxiety attacks and depression. I would like to find a psychiatrist in the Denver metro area who could work with these other issues and consider whether to recommend antidepressants. A psychologist or analyst who would be committed to discussing possible non-medical ways of dealing with the dysphoria, depression, and anxiety would also be helpful. I am very concerned about what I have heard about hormones and surgeries being recommended to teens, and would like to avoid health care practitioners who would steer my teen in that direction. Does anybody know of reliable psychiatrists or other health care practitioners in the Denver metro area? On a broader note, what experiences have you all had with helping a trans identified teen with anxiety, depression, and gender dysphoria, and have you found medical practitioners who were committed to examining other avenues than referrals to clinics for hormones and surgeries?  

Hello MomToTroubledTeen, 

Welcome to the forum. Your account has been activated and you now have access to the members-only area. Please post back here if you still cannot access the members-only area.
Posted by MomToTroubledTeen - 16-May-2021, 06:56 PM
(29-Mar-2018, 08:10 PM)tamara Wrote: Hello I'm new to this GCSB and I cannot figure out how to get to the "members" section. I go around & around & can't get out of the guest zone. I am logged in. Could you PLEASE explain how to "post" in the "members only forum"? I can't figure out this website. I guess I should be more savvy. 
Thanks!

MODERATOR EDIT: If you are seeking therapist recommendations, please join this forum as a member; once your membership is activated, please post your request in our members-only forum. Once you have joined the forum, you will be able to send and receive private messages (PMs) from fellow members -- and this is the preferred method of exchanging therapist information. Due to privacy considerations, we are no longer posting therapist names on the forum.

To join the board, click on "join" in the black bar at the top of the page and follow the prompts. Please know that before new members can access the members-only forums, all memberships must be manually activated by a moderator, and this can take anywhere from an hour to a day. Your patience is necessary and appreciated. Thank you.

Now back to Tamara's post:

I have a fourteen-year old who started to have sudden onset gender dysphoria at age thirteen along with identifying from that time as a trans guy. My teen has a set of other issues as well, particularly anxiety attacks and depression. I would like to find a psychiatrist in the Denver metro area who could work with these other issues and consider whether to recommend antidepressants. A psychologist or analyst who would be committed to discussing possible non-medical ways of dealing with the dysphoria, depression, and anxiety would also be helpful. I am very concerned about what I have heard about hormones and surgeries being recommended to teens, and would like to avoid health care practitioners who would steer my teen in that direction. Does anybody know of reliable psychiatrists or other health care practitioners in the Denver metro area? On a broader note, what experiences have you all had with helping a trans identified teen with anxiety, depression, and gender dysphoria, and have you found medical practitioners who were committed to examining other avenues than referrals to clinics for hormones and surgeries?  
Posted by Marge Bouvier Simpson - 13-May-2021, 02:49 AM
(12-May-2021, 07:40 PM)grandmotherd Wrote:
(31-Mar-2018, 05:45 PM)candycigs Wrote: My daughters therapist just got back with me with a referral. I will PM you.

I live in Denver and I, too, would like that therapist's name.  Can you private message me through this? I am new to this forum.

Hi grandmotherd, welcome to the forum. Your account has been activated. I hope you will hear something from candycigs or perhaps another member; the post from candycigs is three years old so I'm not sure whether this member still frequents the forum or has a lead to share at this point.

I invite you to post your request in the members-only area where more members are likely to see it, although I will caution there is no guarantee of getting a response, as it seems therapists who do not immediately affirm are in short supply. You may find it most effective to do some detective work and find a therapist on your own; there are tips on what to look for and questions to ask therapists in the members' area as well.

Best wishes to you in your search.
Posted by grandmotherd - 12-May-2021, 07:40 PM
(31-Mar-2018, 05:45 PM)candycigs Wrote: My daughters therapist just got back with me with a referral. I will PM you.

I live in Denver and I, too, would like that therapist's name.  Can you private message me through this? I am new to this forum.
Posted by Marge Bouvier Simpson - 12-May-2021, 04:06 AM
(11-May-2021, 08:16 PM)Lion Wrote:
(07-May-2021, 04:29 PM)Frankie Wrote: Hi - I am looking for a therapist in the NYC metro area ( Jersey side ) for my child who just turned 14.  Five months ago my daughter declared she was trans.  She is now he and has a new name and is single minded in his/her desire for testosterone.  She also has ADHD, depression, anxiety and a handful of sensory issues.   I am looking for a clinician who is willing to neither affirm or deny the trans identity.  Also, we told our child we would seek guidance from a gender clinic.  Does anyone know which one has the longest waiting list?  Our goal is for our child to be who they need to be but get the benefit of a natural puberty and wait to make any medical interventions.  Thanks.
Hi Frankie,
Stay out of gender clinics if you can.  they tend to be run by very young inexperienced grad school students who are trained in 1 day by WPATH.  Find a CBT based therapist who can treat her for depression and anxiety (make it someone no-nonsense with a ton of experience) but bring up the trans issue first, say that you don't affirm it and that you suspect is her way of dealing with her difficulties, see if they will set it aside.  Your child is 14, tell her you cannot find a good gender clinic and take her to someone who can help her.  Also, find out what she's looking at online.

I agree with Lion. Stay far away from gender clinics. You will never find "a clinician who is willing to neither affirm or deny the trans identity" in a gender clinic. Unless your child tells the gender clinic that she is absolutely not trans, the gender clinic will only affirm and move her toward transition. Stay far away.
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