Please note that new posts in this forum must be approved by a moderator before becoming visible.
Post a New Reply
Reply to thread: Our Discussion Topics
Username:
Post Subject:
Post Icon:
Your Message:
Smilies
Smile Wink Cool Big Grin
Tongue Rolleyes Shy Sad
At Angel Angry Blush
Confused Dodgy Exclamation Heart
Huh Idea Sleepy Undecided
[get more]
Post Options:
Thread Subscription:
Specify the type of notification and thread subscription you'd like to have to this thread. (Registered users only)




Human Verification
Please tick the checkbox that you see below. This process is used to prevent automated spam bots.


This is the Public Section of the Board. Please remember:
This Sub Forum is readable by Guests. It is here for:

PUBLIC INFORMATION About Gender Critical

Explanations for Guests about who we are/what we discuss.

Please do not post discussions with other members here.


Thread Review (Newest First)
Posted by Marge Bouvier Simpson - 17-Jun-2020, 03:26 PM
Thanks, JDMum, for welcoming Parker005.

Parker005, your account has been activated. Welcome to the forum.
Posted by Jdmum - 16-Jun-2020, 10:01 PM
(16-Jun-2020, 07:00 PM)Parker005 Wrote: Hello everyone:

We are on day two of my daughter is exploring the idea of trying on boy for size. I do not mean that to downplay anything. She is exploring options. I want to put a lot of context below, and apologize in advance. I am the father

She has feminine mannerisms, and loves lighter brighter colors. A matter a fact we are going to paint a cubby area for her art projects in Pink (We do not push so all choices are hers). She is light hearted, and has more girl friends than boy friends. She broke up with a boy last year, and she cried and was very upset. This lasted days. Eventually they became friends again.
She likes to go outside, likes nature, and calls animal adorable. She started her period about a year ago, and believe it is uncomfortable, as is the changes that are going on inside.

A lot of her friends are part of LGBTQ community, and we support people that truly want to affect change. This is one sphere of influence we believe.
She wanted to cut her hair short (pixie cut), and she likes wearing comfy clothes. Sometimes girlish clothes other times boyish clothes.
While she is testing this out she wanted to call herself Alex. Her good friend is Alexa so there might be something there.

She is into drama, art, nature, and she has had interest in dance, horse back riding, and some sports like softball, Soccer and Field hockey.

She is on a board/group in the LGBTQ community through the school, and I am trying to find a way to see and understand if they are luring her in like a beam, or if it is open support.
She does watch different skits and shows on tmblr, insta, youtube, tick tock....

I had a very open conversation with her. I wanted to get as much information from her so we can try and understand, and a decent amount willingly came out. I believe she was being honest and sincere. She is exploring the idea of being called a boys name, short hair, and some boy clothes. Nothing else at this time. At one moment I broke down and cried, and she started crying as well. Not sure what that means. I told her that I was not angry, my tears were from a lack of understanding as we just found out, and am trying me best to understand. Multiple times she told me she is just trying it out to se how it makes her feel. She wasn't putting up any expectations, but currently that is where she is, and may change.

We did tell her that we would like her and the two older boys to get out more, and get off of the devices. I am not sure this is enough, or if we should take a harder stance or not. It's a sensitive topic, and we do not want her to be defensive. In the end of the day I want her to be the Happiest, and Heathiest version of herself. She said that she doesn't want to loose who she is today. Meaning, nice, caring, loving, sensitive etc... If I think of some potential outcomes I just don't see how someone would be able to go full transgender and keep who they are as a person. We are hoping this is a phase, but are deeply concerned for her future, and afraid she is being lured in by a culture swing more so than what is best for her, and will make her happy even if that is a compromise. She is very young and can be immature at times. Not sure if there is anything there.

On a side note my wife just got home, and they both went shopping. They were looking at a waste basket, and my daughter picked a light blue one with a flower on it.

Any insight would be greatly appreciated. Again the goal is to support her, but make sure she is the happiest healthiest version.
Hi Parker005

So sorry you have ended up here but welcome.  You didn’t say how old your daughter is.  I’m not sure if you have access to the other parts of the forum yet but if not you will soon once your account has been activated.

There are lots of different sections ie age related, parents of girls etc.

 I have a son going through it so not much help on the girl/daughter side of things.

I’m sure a parent of a daughter will see this & reply.  Only other thing is, once your account is activated, search & read as much as you can.

Take care x
Posted by Treadinginwater - 16-Jun-2020, 07:00 PM
Hello everyone:

We are on day two of my daughter is exploring the idea of trying on boy for size. I do not mean that to downplay anything. She is exploring options. I want to put a lot of context below, and apologize in advance. I am the father

She has feminine mannerisms, and loves lighter brighter colors. A matter a fact we are going to paint a cubby area for her art projects in Pink (We do not push so all choices are hers). She is light hearted, and has more girl friends than boy friends. She broke up with a boy last year, and she cried and was very upset. This lasted days. Eventually they became friends again.
She likes to go outside, likes nature, and calls animal adorable. She started her period about a year ago, and believe it is uncomfortable, as is the changes that are going on inside.

A lot of her friends are part of LGBTQ community, and we support people that truly want to affect change. This is one sphere of influence we believe.
She wanted to cut her hair short (pixie cut), and she likes wearing comfy clothes. Sometimes girlish clothes other times boyish clothes.
While she is testing this out she wanted to call herself Alex. Her good friend is Alexa so there might be something there.

She is into drama, art, nature, and she has had interest in dance, horse back riding, and some sports like softball, Soccer and Field hockey.

She is on a board/group in the LGBTQ community through the school, and I am trying to find a way to see and understand if they are luring her in like a beam, or if it is open support.
She does watch different skits and shows on tmblr, insta, youtube, tick tock....

I had a very open conversation with her. I wanted to get as much information from her so we can try and understand, and a decent amount willingly came out. I believe she was being honest and sincere. She is exploring the idea of being called a boys name, short hair, and some boy clothes. Nothing else at this time. At one moment I broke down and cried, and she started crying as well. Not sure what that means. I told her that I was not angry, my tears were from a lack of understanding as we just found out, and am trying me best to understand. Multiple times she told me she is just trying it out to se how it makes her feel. She wasn't putting up any expectations, but currently that is where she is, and may change.

We did tell her that we would like her and the two older boys to get out more, and get off of the devices. I am not sure this is enough, or if we should take a harder stance or not. It's a sensitive topic, and we do not want her to be defensive. In the end of the day I want her to be the Happiest, and Heathiest version of herself. She said that she doesn't want to loose who she is today. Meaning, nice, caring, loving, sensitive etc... If I think of some potential outcomes I just don't see how someone would be able to go full transgender and keep who they are as a person. We are hoping this is a phase, but are deeply concerned for her future, and afraid she is being lured in by a culture swing more so than what is best for her, and will make her happy even if that is a compromise. She is very young and can be immature at times. Not sure if there is anything there.

On a side note my wife just got home, and they both went shopping. They were looking at a waste basket, and my daughter picked a light blue one with a flower on it.

Any insight would be greatly appreciated. Again the goal is to support her, but make sure she is the happiest healthiest version.
Posted by Marge Bouvier Simpson - 07-Jun-2020, 03:12 PM
Hi, Brookiema79, and welcome. Your account has been activated.

I'm sorry about what you and your daughter are dealing with. Please don't blame yourself. There is so much influence directed at kids these days, making them believe that becoming someone else is the answer to their feeling uncomfortable with the demands of growing up in today's world.

You'll find lots of advice in the members-only area, as well as parents who understand your fears and what you're dealing with.

Again, welcome.
Posted by Brookiema79 - 07-Jun-2020, 02:10 PM
My 13 year old daughter told me yesterday that she wants to be a boy. That she feels like a boy. I have had my suspicions and knew the time had come to confront them.  We had a long talk and I told her that although I love her, will always be right by her side, and empathize with the confusion and torment she may be feeling over this, that I don’t BLAME HER for her feelings, but that we (she and I), will not agree to accept that lifestyle. I feel like my world is falling apart and just want my little girl back. I feel so alone and ashamed and I blame myself. I created her! I can’t stop crying. I did not share these feelings with her. Except that I blame myself. I am trying to put on a brave face in front of her until I figure out what to do. I realize that in my situation, immediate and consistent action is going to have to be taken. I am glad I found this board and hope that I can get some insight from it. I am at the beginning of what I believe is going to be a difficult road for me and my girl. And I just want my baby back.
Posted by Surprise! - 16-Mar-2020, 12:45 PM
(27-Feb-2020, 08:24 PM)Zoomo Wrote: Out of the blue, our 16 yo son told us he is transgender about 8 month ago. He has always struggled with social anxiety and depression, but has never shown any inclination that he was a "girl trapped in a boy body." He has been seeing a counselor regularly; even though she is an affirming therapist and an ally, she herself said his story is "not consistent" with her other transgendered clients. We have refused any medical treatments or calling him by a different pronoun or name (which he has changed 5 times), but have let him experiment with feminine clothes/makeup at home. He usually tries something new then discards after a few weeks (because it's not making him happy!). Lately, he's been wearing a stuffed bra to school. It hasn't been noticeable so far because its winter and he wears sweatshirts, but warmer weather is approaching and we are afraid he will be discovered and potentially bullied and/or ostracized than he already is. We feel that wearing feminine clothes/bra in public and the potential for negative reactions from his peer group will confound his capacity for the "cautious exploration." As he still has two more years of high school left to navigate safely, we're torn between letting him publicly explore reactions and putting our foot down. We've been walking a thin line. It's so difficult knowing what to do and there's not much help online.

Hi Zoomo,

Hou sent me a private message, and I tried to respond, but it says your account is set to refuse private messages.  Fix that and send me another and I'll send you my reply.
Posted by Marge Bouvier Simpson - 27-Feb-2020, 11:11 PM
(27-Feb-2020, 01:26 PM)Mtnmum777 Wrote: Hello,
Wondering if I can join this group?
My son, who's in his early 20's, is dealing with gender dyphoria and we believe he's on female hormones, although he has not told us yet.

Thank you!

Welcome Mtnmum777, your account has been activated. Welcome to the forum. I'm sorry to hear your son is dealing with dysphoria. I hope you'll find the forum helpful.

(27-Feb-2020, 08:24 PM)Zoomo Wrote: Out of the blue, our 16 yo son told us he is transgender about 8 month ago. He has always struggled with social anxiety and depression, but has never shown any inclination that he was a "girl trapped in a boy body." He has been seeing a counselor regularly; even though she is an affirming therapist and an ally, she herself said his story is "not consistent" with her other transgendered clients. We have refused any medical treatments or calling him by a different pronoun or name (which he has changed 5 times), but have let him experiment with feminine clothes/makeup at home. He usually tries something new then discards after a few weeks (because it's not making him happy!). Lately, he's been wearing a stuffed bra to school. It hasn't been noticeable so far because its winter and he wears sweatshirts, but warmer weather is approaching and we are afraid he will be discovered and potentially bullied and/or ostracized than he already is. We feel that wearing feminine clothes/bra in public and the potential for negative reactions from his peer group will confound his capacity for the "cautious exploration." As he still has two more years of high school left to navigate safely, we're torn between letting him publicly explore reactions and putting our foot down. We've been walking a thin line. It's so difficult knowing what to do and there's not much help online.

Hello, Zoomo and welcome. I'm sorry to hear about all your son is dealing with. It seems the phenomenon with skyrocketing numbers of girls coming out transgender boys is making the news these days, but it seems there are many, many boys also coming out as trans despite not having shown any sort of feminine bent. You'll find solidarity here. Welcome.
Posted by Zoomo - 27-Feb-2020, 08:24 PM
Out of the blue, our 16 yo son told us he is transgender about 8 month ago. He has always struggled with social anxiety and depression, but has never shown any inclination that he was a "girl trapped in a boy body." He has been seeing a counselor regularly; even though she is an affirming therapist and an ally, she herself said his story is "not consistent" with her other transgendered clients. We have refused any medical treatments or calling him by a different pronoun or name (which he has changed 5 times), but have let him experiment with feminine clothes/makeup at home. He usually tries something new then discards after a few weeks (because it's not making him happy!). Lately, he's been wearing a stuffed bra to school. It hasn't been noticeable so far because its winter and he wears sweatshirts, but warmer weather is approaching and we are afraid he will be discovered and potentially bullied and/or ostracized than he already is. We feel that wearing feminine clothes/bra in public and the potential for negative reactions from his peer group will confound his capacity for the "cautious exploration." As he still has two more years of high school left to navigate safely, we're torn between letting him publicly explore reactions and putting our foot down. We've been walking a thin line. It's so difficult knowing what to do and there's not much help online.
Posted by Mtnmum777 - 27-Feb-2020, 01:26 PM
Hello,
Wondering if I can join this group?
My son, who's in his early 20's, is dealing with gender dyphoria and we believe he's on female hormones, although he has not told us yet.

Thank you!
Posted by - 19-Jan-2020, 08:58 PM
Hi, This is all a new world to me, my adult son has recently told the family he was transgender, Has been taking hormones for months. He has had depression and anxiety for years and this has escalated in the last few weeks. Since being on the hormones he is very emotional. As a family we have surrounded his with love but would love to have back the son we knew. His therapist and gender clinic are encouraging him sadly and I think his immersion in the trans online community was his downfall. I do feel it is a cult that has taken our boy and would love to know how to get him out of it.
This thread has more than 10 replies. Read the whole thread.